1) Show up at the beach with just your board and the bare essentials. No picnics and windbreakers for you!

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2) Throw away the hairbrush for the summer. Embrace the naturally bleached, salty and wavy look

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3) Same goes for clothing. Leave the posh stuff at home. It's sun faded tees, wetsuits and bikinis from here on out

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4) Embrace sunscreen. Kooks might want to wear SPF15 and cook themselves, but real surfers know the pain of a peeling nose in the midday sun...

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5) And wearing makeup? Please....

6) Respect the beach. Littering? Not cool, man

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7) Teach yourself to paddle out and get back in. Being saved by the lifeguard is always embarrassing

8) Acquaint yourself with surf etiquette (don't worry, we've got you covered!)

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9) Before you go in, make a big deal of talking to anyone and everyone with a board

10) Can't catch any waves once you're out there? That's fine! Just sit in the line up and complain loudly about the sucky swell direction

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11) If no one saw you out there however, remember to come back in hooting and talking about your awesome barrel..

12) Find the local surfers' drinking hole and rock up after the sun's gone down

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13) But you'd better learn the slang beforehand....

14) And finally, if anyone asks you about your experience, allude to your painful history in big wave surfing, before looking into the distance and sliding away...