9) Before you go in, make a big deal of talking to anyone and everyone with a board
10) Can’t catch any waves once you’re out there? That’s fine! Just sit in the line up and complain loudly about the sucky swell direction
11) If no one saw you out there however, remember to come back in hooting and talking about your awesome barrel..
12) Find the local surfers’ drinking hole and rock up after the sun’s gone down
13) But you’d better learn the slang beforehand….
14) And finally, if anyone asks you about your experience, allude to your painful history in big wave surfing, before looking into the distance and sliding away…
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