6 ways to feel better since you’re not at Roxy Pro France

Sally Fitzgibbons by ASP / Kirstin Scholtz

The Roxy Pro France contest looks amazing right now. The girls are smashing it in the water and with only two more more stops on the ASP tour to go, and Sally Fitzgibbon’s currently in the lead, things are getting pretty heated.

But alas. We’re in the UK and the weather is predictably rubbish. So we’ve come up with some ways of making ourselves feel better, because there’s no place for doom and gloom when it comes to surfings biggest contest. Here’s our guide to keeping yourself stoked on all the action.

1. Have a live-stream party

Quiksilver & Roxy Pro France 2014 Live Stream

It’s time to make like my Mum and organise a daytime party for everyone you know this weekend. Stick the live-stream on the biggest TV you can find (or hire a projector – here’s a link for Londoners), get out some deck chairs (or cover this one from Argos in a sarong or something), and purchase 1000 of these. Perhaps break out a paddling pool for your guests to dip their feet in while they scream ‘Oh Shit!’ at the amount of air Gilmore’s just got. And remember: if anyone leaves not feeling sick after eating too much French bread and sausage, you have failed as a host.

2. Watch awesome surf movies

The Open Road

So we could tell you to watch Point Break (always watch Point Break). But when the London Surf Film Festival is just around the corner, it seems a shame to ignore their website as a ‘cheering yourself up’ resource. They’ve got a long-list of short films on their website, and if you don’t have time to watch all of those, you can see which were lucky enough to be chosen to show at the festival here.

3. Go to Bedford

They do indoor surfing there. It’s £300 for an hour-long private session. Actually, don’t do this. Do number four…

4. Go to Cornwall

That’s more like it. The only thing that can truly fill that hole in your heart that bleeds cold-water is an actual trip to the waves. Since the summer suddenly disappeared this morning (yep, literally happened this morning), we advise taking warm clothes and an optimistic attitude.

5. Actually go to France

Photo by ASP / Kirstin Scholtz

Like we said above, France is pretty close. Google reckons it takes 12 hours to drive from the Cooler office in London to Seignosse. So if you’re based in the south of England it’s feasible that you could leave tonight after work, spend the night somewhere about half-way (like in Alençon, where you can book a double room for €44 right now), and be watching Carissa Moore by lunchtime on Saturday.

Travelling in a Vauxhall Corsa will cost you about £278.38 in petrol for the return trip, plus about £164 for the channel tunnel and €20 for this camping car park near the action. That totals just under £500, but if you manage to fill your car with surfing enthusiasts (try Bla Bla Car if you lack the friends), then things work out at a bit over £100 each (that’s making allowances for a higher spend on hotel rooms). Add in food and equipment hire and you’re looking at £200 for the weekend. Not a super-terrifying price tag, and way more fun than a bloody wave machine. Disclaimer: this plan involves pulling a sicky on Monday.

Or, if you were being less spontaneous, you could always go to the next round of the ASP tour in Portugal, next weekend. You can leave from Luton on Friday morning, and return from Lisbon on Monday, for £131.98. Then there’s a bus and a train from the airport to Cascais and… oh we’re bored of maths. You could go though. That’s our point.

6. Splash salt water into your eyes

Like monks who fast to bring themselves closer to Christ, using a pipette to put salt water into your eyes will indeed make you feel spiritually closer to Lakey Peterson. All you need to do afterwards is 400 push-ups to mimic the muscle pain and you’re pretty much the same as an ASP champion. Right? RIGHT?


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